The truth is that there is no schedule for how long grief lasts or how you should feel after a certain amount of time. Every person who is going through such a heartbreaking situation has a different way of getting better. After some time has passed, our grief begins to feel less tangible. We wonder if we’re still upset, if we should still be upset, or if it’s okay to do something fun and not think about our loss.
This article will help you understand what grief is and what you can expect during this time.
Table of Contents
1. The 5 Stages Of Grief
In the early stages of grief, you might feel like you have a million things to do and figure out, or you might feel initial shock and numbness. After a few months, your friends and family may stop being as helpful as they were initially.
At the same time that people stop helping you as much, you might feel less numb. When these things happen, you’ll realise how different your life is without the person you love, and you’ll start to miss them.
The five-stage mourning model, which you may have come across while looking for answers, says that a person goes through five stages after a loved one dies.
The first stage in the grieving process is denial. It’s normal to feel helpless, confused, and painful emotions after learning of a loved one’s death. The usual defence strategy against this is pretending nothing has happened.
Denial might help temporarily dull the pain, but it can also provide you with the space and time to learn to deal with your feelings when they arise.
The second stage in the grieving process is anger. Anger is a normal emotional reaction to the suffering produced by loss, and it can be felt against the deceased, oneself, others, or one’s environment. As you work through your own feelings, this response may make you feel even worse about yourself, leading to even more anger.
You could wonder, “why me?” or “why now?” and feel a growing frustration as you reflect on the memories you shared with the deceased and the uncertainty of your future without them. Because of this, you may feel lonely and abandoned while you grieve.
The third stage in the grieving process is bargaining. If you feel hopeless throughout your grieving process, you may try to bargain with yourself or a higher force like God or something (or someone) greater than yourself to maintain a semblance of optimism.
This is called “bargaining,” It generally involves giving up something you value in exchange for reuniting with the deceased and returning life to normal.
The danger of this line of thought is that it might cause you to dwell on the past and regret your choices or the outcomes you hoped for.
The most expected part of the grieving process is experiencing deep sadness and yearning for the deceased.
As the truth of your predicament sinks in, you may feel helpless and unable to cope with the outside world. You may experience this in spurts or feel stuck in the void that loss has created. Depression is a normal reaction to loss, but it may make grieving feel even more isolating and lonely.
The last stage of the grieving process is acceptance. Many grievers mistakenly believe that after they’ve reached the acceptance stage of grieving, they’ll finally be able to move on from the anguish their loss has caused.
However, being accepted in this situation requires you to embrace your new reality, which involves adapting to a life without the person you once knew.
Instead of wishing things were different or refusing to accept reality, you realise that you can accept your loss. This doesn’t imply you won’t ever feel sad or have a terrible day again; rather, it’s a sign that you’re finally adjusting to your new normal.
2. Everybody Grieves Differently
You may be asking, how long should it take to grieve? It can take a long time to get used to the loss of someone you care about, and just as everyone’s grief is different, so are their feelings as time goes on.
Grief is a natural response to loss.
That pain you experience when something or someone you care about is taken away. The sting of bereavement can sometimes feel insurmountable. Some of the most challenging and unexpected feelings you might have include: astonishment, wrath, disbelief, guilt, and deep grief.
Grief is an emotional and physical ordeal that can leave you unable to focus or even function normally. These are all natural responses to loss; the greater the loss, the more profound the mourning.
Many people experience trauma-related grief.
Although it hurts, grieving is a natural response to loss. Grief is painful and overpowering, but it usually passes through phases and becomes less frequent as time goes by.
There is no set time limit for healing; however, many people report lessening of symptoms 6-12 months following a loss, and this trend often continues. Adding insult to injury, traumatic events frequently accompany losses for those suffering from trauma grieving.
Grief caused by trauma is a normal and common response to the death of a loved one who was lost. Grief caused by trauma can happen in the days, weeks, months, or years after a close person dies. Trauma-related grief can happen at any time, but it is important to know that there are many ways to deal with this kind of loss.
After a traumatic event, a lot of people feel intense sadness, anger, guilt, anxiety, or depression. They might also find it hard to sleep or focus on everyday tasks. While grieving, some people feel numb or cut off from their feelings and the world around them.
There are many ways to deal with grief after a traumatic loss, but some people find it helpful to talk to others who have been through the same thing. People who want to talk to people who understand what they are going through can also join online support groups.
Physical pain and loneliness are common symptoms of grief.
Knowing where to turn and what to do when you’re sad is hard.
Pain and feeling alone are two of the most common signs of grief. Not only are you sad, but your body is also having a hard time dealing with the loss of someone.. Your mind and body are out of sync, and it can feel like nothing will ever be right again. But we’re here to tell you that you can get through this hard time.
First of all, get help if you’re in a lot of physical pain or feeling very alone. You can talk to friends, family, or strangers in online support groups or forums if you need to. If the pain or loneliness gets too much for you, talk to your doctor about medications that might help ease these symptoms until they go away on their own.
If your grief is causing problems for example, if it’s making it hard for you to pay your bills or keep a job, you might want to talk to a licensed therapist who specialises in grief counselling. They will be able to help you through this hard time as best they can.
Grief can interfere with your sleep, energy level, and appetite.
The grief of losing a loved one can often make you feel like you’re living in a fog. You might notice that you’re having trouble sleeping or that your energy level has been affected. You may also find it difficult to eat normally.
These are all normal side effects of grief, and there are steps you can take to help yourself feel better as quickly as possible.
Here are some suggestions for coping with grief:
- Try to eat regularly and get plenty of sleep. Your body needs these necessities to stay healthy and strong, even when you’re feeling down.
- Write down your thoughts in a journal if they won’t stop running through your mind while trying to fall asleep or concentrate during the day. Sometimes getting our thoughts out of our heads can help us move forward more easily.
- Exercise! Even if it’s just going for a walk around the block, exercising will help relieve stress and boost endorphins, making you feel better overall!
Grief often triggers a desire to be with family or friends.
Grief can be a lonely process. When people are in the grieving process, they often feel a strong desire to be with their family and friends. This is normal, but it can also be difficult for those who don’t know how to react when someone is grieving.
If you’re not sure what to do or say when someone is grieving, here are a few things you can do:
- Don’t avoid them. You don’t have to ask questions or avoid talking about death, but you can still be there for your friend by showing up in person and listening to them talk about their loved one without assuming what they need from you.
Be patient with the process. Grief is different for everyone, so no matter how long it takes for your friend to process their loss and move on with life again, always be there for them.
3. Counselling Or Other Forms Of Therapy
Counselling or other types of therapy can help some people deal with the emotions that come with grief.
It’s important to remember that not everyone who has lost a loved one needs to go to counselling. Some people might find it helpful, while others might do better with something else, like medication or self-care techniques.
Conclusion On How Long Grief Lasts
Grief is an individual experience. There is no set amount of time that everyone must grieve to show respect to the deceased. People grieve differently, and it lasts as long as it takes.
Remember that there are people out there who do have the power to help you through this process: friends, family, and even professionals may be able to help you make some sense of your loss so that you can begin to integrate it into your life moving forward.
Don’t let grief prohibit you from living a happy life; find ways to incorporate your loved ones into your life—and always make them a part of your story.
Frequently Asked Questions On How Long Grief Lasts
What Is Anticipatory Grief?
It’s common for people to keep their own feelings about an impending loss to themselves. This is a sorrow we bear alone. Minimal active interference is what we seek. Words aren’t necessary; all it takes is a hand to hold or some quiet time together to ease the pain. In normal grief, we dwell on what we’ve lost, but in anticipatory grief, we worry about what we’ll lose in the future.
What Is The Distinction Between Grief And Mourning?
Loss is experienced on the inside, but its effects are shown externally via mourning. It consists of our daily routines, traditions, and rituals. Grief is the emotional reaction to a loss. Grief is an interior process, a journey.
Will Grief Counseling Help Me?
There is great value in participating in a bereavement support group. When you’re in the midst of your loss, it’s easy to feel that everyone else has already gone on. A support group is a place where you may go to feel secure sharing your thoughts about your loss and grieving with others who understand what you’re going through.
Any local healthcare facility, hospice, counselling centre, or house of worship should be able to point you in the direction of a grieving support group.
What Is Complicated Grief?
Complicated grief, also known as complicated bereavement disorder, can arise in those who have recently lost a loved one or are feeling sadness for another cause.
A person suffering from complicated grief may also exhibit dysfunctional behaviours and experience illogical notions, such as believing that the deceased may return. It is a sort of prolonged mourning that might hinder one’s life. Grief becomes complex when it endures. According to a study by Katherine Shear, MD, Approximately 7% of bereaved individuals may have complicated grief.
When Should I Seek Professional Help?
In some circumstances, grieving doesn’t get better. You may be incapable of accepting the loss, as this can be traumatic. Seek professional help if you experience any of the following:
- You have difficulty maintaining your typical schedule, such as working and cleaning the house.
- Thoughts that life is not worth living or that self-harm is a viable option.
- Any incapacity to quit self-blaming
- Strong feelings of sadness